2.14.14. friday reflections.
the desire map. core desired feelings.

2014 OLW. february thoughts on FORWARD.

Forward one little wordTwo steps forward, three steps back...that's the dance that I've been doing for the last couple of weeks. I've been settling into my OLW this year, witnessing how it's going to show up. In 2012, my OLW was often a battle cry, an order (shift, NOW) from the Universe. FORWARD is quieter, but just as powerful.

This year, I think that FORWARD is going to be a constant foundation. It's not a marching order (although when Barb sends me a text saying FORWARD!, I imagine her in military garb, sitting on a horse, hoisting a rifle in the air...). It's becoming the basis of pretty much everything this year...a starting place from which to rebuild. What's really present for me right now...

Moving FORWARD with fitness. I've been going to Barre Sculpt 5 days per week for the past 2 weeks (separate blog post coming soon). It's hard, and I often shed tears on my drive home....but it's a reminder that I can find physical strength again. 

Trying to be kind about practicing forgiveness & moving FORWARD after missteps. I got very frustrated & angry today with a local serviceman. I *swore - not really AT him, but at the situation. It wasn't kind. I'm trying to just move on, rather then berating myself about not being myBESTself. *just to be clear...I swear A LOT, but I don't typically swear at people.

Really, really practicing moving FORWARD in a few relationships, while recognizing that forward may mean moving in separate directions. This is so very hard for me. My friend, Mo, once observed that I "collect" people the way that many collect things. She marvels at the fact that I am still in touch with, and friends with, many people from my childhood and our teenage years. Letting go of friendships is a loss that I never handle well. Working on it. 

In the cheeky sense of the word, I was a bit FORWARD about inviting myself to an Instameet in Burlington next weekend. EEEKKKS! What in the world am I thinking? I am an introvert, for pete's sake! Even so, I'm going to meet a bunch of IGers in Burlington. Wish me luck!

I'm also practicing leaning into a few things - and leaning is a FORWARD motion, right? 

 

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